A Threenager's Mind

Johnny, 3 years, 4 months old:

"You are not people, you are my parents."
"Ok, you have three options. 1) I don't brush my teeth. 2) You don't brush my teeth. 3) Julian don't brush my teeth."
Me: "Johnny, how come you see your friend the Dragon, and I don't?"
Johnny: "Because he has white eyes."
"Haha, I farted on you!"
"Moonpowder doesn't work on dinosaurs."
Me: "How are you?"
Johnny: "I still have fever."
Me: "But you didn't have fever this morning.  What do you mean? How do you feel?"
Johnny: "I feel nervous."


Greatest Hits